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Too much of a good thing?
Have you put on weight over the summer holidays, do you despair of ever losing weight?
Have you eaten too many ice creams, cakes, afternoon teas and puddings that have added to your waistline, causing you to either put on more weight or put back on the pounds you so carefully lost in the spring?
Don’t give up. Don’t tell yourself that you will never eat another ice cream, cake, chocolate or packet of crisps again because that way leads to failure. Depriving yourself never works in the long term.
Look again at the first paragraph ‘Have you eaten too many ice creams, cakes…etc?. The clue is in the words ‘too many’, and often when we have deprived ourselves of all things nice we end up over indulging. The villains aren’t the cakes and chocolate, the problem lies with eating too many of them.
Next time you are tempted to have a treat then indulge in the treat and enjoy it to the fullest even if it’s only a biscuit; don’t eat it standing up in the kitchen hoping no one will see you. Put the biscuit on a plate, sit in a comfy armchair, eat it slowly and savour the flavour.
If you enjoy your treats in this way then they become more satisfying, something to indulge in, something to look forward to. For example, tell yourself that when you have finished this job, you will have whatever your favourite indulgence is and look forward to it and enjoy it. Then carry on with your work feeling rewarded. Instead of buying family bags of fun size treats or bargain biscuits, treat yourself to the best you can afford then savour the flavour and make them last.
This way you will find you are eating less in the way of fattening snack foods and you will find it easier to lose weight and more importantly keep the weight at bay.
I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including anxiety coping mechanisms, stress relief, weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online. Please get in touch to find out more.
Diet diary
Do your New Year’s resolutions always start with losing weight? When January starts are you always a little bit heavier than last year. Are you always thinking along the lines of if I could just lose half a stone by the end of the month.
Losing weight is difficult and the older we get the harder it becomes. The new clothes we bought last year in the sales are now a little bit tighter than they were before. Our wardrobes are full of clothes that aren’t quite comfortable.
By the end of January we give up in despair. We tell ourselves that now we have eaten all the chocolate and treats left from Christmas, we will start dieting properly. We will have lost that extra weight by the end of February but then along comes Valentine’s Day or a birthday and here is another box of chocolates.
The shops start to fill with Easter eggs and the weather is still cold. We tell ourselves we deserve a treat and that and as long as we have lost weight before summer holidays all will be well. Why is it so hard to lose weight? The newspapers, magazines and the internet are full of diets. There are so many different ones just this week I have read about the keto diet, the fast 800 diet, the fast 800 keto diet, the low carb dietB and more In addition to this there are diets to relieve our various ailments like recently I saw a diet to help arthritis and in the same magazine a diet to help you sleep.
Of course insomnia and arthritis and many more ills can all be helped if we lose weight. The big question is why don’t we manage to do it. Why will our resolutions in 2024 nearly all start again with losing weight?
The answer lies in all that conflicting information. It also lies in the fact we don’t actually think about what we eat. Our lives are busy and we grab our meals on the go. When working we grab a sandwich whilst at the computer and eat it without thinking about it.
Many of my clients list their healthy meals proudly and it is only when pushed
They remember the cakes, the chocolate bars etc. Recently in the newspaper someone said that taking cakes to work should be banned. Everyone knows how it cheers us up if someone brings cakes into the office.These cakes are okay and do no harm as long as you remember them and forgo the chocolate bar you normally eat on the way home from work, or ask you if you ever need that chocolate bar.
Becoming aware of what you eat and when you eat is the way to kick start your weight loss in 2023. Write it down and keep a food diary for a few weeks. You will soon be surprised at how much you eat without remembering it. This may stop you reaching for the biscuit tin when you are bored. When you find you have lost a few pounds then you have the motivation to carry on.
I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including anxiety coping mechanisms, stress relief, weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online. Please get in touch to find out more.
Treat yourself this Christmas
Christmas this year seems to be suffering with a greater burden of stress than ever before. Not only are we juggling the usual round of shopping, carol services, nativity plays etc there is the added strain of rising prices and fuel costs.
The news and social media are full of doom and gloom, the cost of heating our homes is rising and the weather is colder than it has been for a long time.
This year self care is more important than ever before. Self hypnosis can help you relax and perhaps if you can use your subconscious mind to imagine your lying on a tropical beach you can forget the cold for a short time.
Self hypnosis can be as easy as relaxing all the muscles in your face, starting with muscles in your forehead and between your eyes. Relaxing the muscles in your face helps your body to relax quickly and easily, after the forehead try relaxing the muscles around your nose and mouth, then your cheeks. Once you have relaxed your face so completely that it is expressionless, take a deep breath and allow the relaxation to flow through your body. With practice it can be as easy as that.
In between all the rush and clammer of Christmas take five minutes to do this and you will be amazed at how refreshed you feel. If when you are relaxed you can conjure up that tropical beach in your mind that is a bonus.
I hope everyone is able to enjoy a good Christmas and avoid the flu and colds that are going around. Turn on the radio and belt out those Christmas songs however old fashioned and corny they are. When we think of Christmas past it’s not the value of the presents under the tree but the love that comes from the people who share Christmas with us.
I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including anxiety coping mechanisms, stress relief, weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online. Please get in touch to find out more.
Coping with grief
During this strange time when we have all been shocked and saddened by the death of Queen Elizabeth II. Many people have spoken of their surprise at the sense of loss that they themselves have felt.
The death of the Queen has caused many people to revisit their own personal losses of parents, grandparents, family members and close friends. When we suffer a bereavement the grief grows less over time. It doesn’t completely heal but a scab forms and we lose the immediate sense of loss.
When there is a national bereavement such as we are now experiencing that scab is lifted and we find that underneath there is still a sore place. Memories return of those times of personal loss and we realise once again we will never speak with our loved ones or hear their voice.
As we get older there are more losses in our lives and more scabs that are lifted. It is no surprise then that many people feel a sense of grief that leaves them with a desire to show that grief. Whether we leave flowers at the palace or sign a book of remembrance we are also acknowledging our own losses.
In today’s fast paced world often we have little time to grieve. When we lose an elderly parent there is often a sense that they had a good long life so there is little need to grieve their passing. What we feel is the loss of all those memories of the times we had together and however old they are we still feel a sense of shock at their passing.
If you have lost a loved one perhaps you could buy a bunch of their favourite flowers, not to put in a cold churchyard but to put in your home and remember them. It’s less the things we do that we regret, it’s the things we don’t do. If our elderly relatives are still around, perhaps we can spare five minute for a cup of tea or a brief telephone call, even if their response is not always as gracious as we’d like.
As we look at the faces of the Queen’s family coming to terms with the loss of their mother, spare a moment to remember all those we have also lost.
I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including coping mechanisms for grief, stress relief, anxiety, weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online via Zoom. Please get in touch to find out more.
Fake it till you make it
One of the most special parts of our subconscious mind is our imagination. Our imagination allows us to create scenarios of events and things that will happen and have happened in our lives.
Sadly many of us use our imagination to create the worst possible scenario. We create images of what might go wrong, scenes of chaos and disaster. We seem to be able to imagine failing far easier than success. If we have to do something like public speaking or an interview we imagine every possible thing that can go wrong.
We are always being told to think positive thoughts but in a world surrounded by bad news and the gloom and doom mongers on social media it can seem hard to do this.
We can, however, imagine good things if we try. Close your eyes now and imagine you are on a warm sandy beach relaxing listening to the ocean. It really isn’t that hard to do. People think they actually have to visualise things to imagine them but we don’t. When we read a book we can be transported to the scene of the action without pictures that is our imagination at work.
When I was in a school one day a young girl was sitting on the floor refusing to go into the exam room. I sat down next to her on the floor and asked what was wrong.
“I don’t want to go into that room and take my exam, I hate that room I hate exams,” she said.
“Where would you like to be?” I asked.
“Playing in my garden with my new puppy,” she said.
I told her to close her eyes and imagine that she was playing with the puppy. A smile soon came to her face.
“Let’s stand up and keep that image of your puppy with you while we go in that room,” I said.
Telling her to keep imagining the puppy with her, she went into the exam room and sat down still smiling. I am pleased to say the school reported that she did her exam and passed. She told me herself later she imagined having the puppy with her before every exam after that.
So you can try, imagine yourself being more confident, imagine your presentation going well. Create an image in your mind’s eye and make it as strong as possible of you feeling confident and at ease with yourself.
You can do this with practice, and it can become second nature to you, so that all those things that used to upset and worry you, you can handle with calm confidence, all the things that used to be difficult for you to deal with come easy from now on.
Your subconscious knows exactly what is needed and knows how to help you. So by letting yourself use that powerful imagination of yours, by seeing yourself in that special way that you know says confidence, you can begin to enjoy the things that you do.
I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including anxiety coping mechanisms, stress relief, weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online via Zoom. Please get in touch to find out more.
Put a spring in your step
Three months of 2022 have already gone and in two week’s time it will be Easter. Are you still sticking to your New Year resolutions or is it time for a rethink? Have you lost the weight you planned to lose in January or have you added a few more pounds over the winter months. Have you visited the gym you joined with such high hopes or do you avoid looking at the payment going out of your bank account each month?
Sometimes we start with too many goals and new plans and when they fall by the wayside we not only give up but we beat ourselves up as being useless and hopeless. That journey of 1000 miles always begins with the first step.
It is often better to set small goals and then when we achieve them we can congratulate ourselves and gain confidence to face the next step. Instead of setting out to run a marathon, start with a small challenge of going for a fifteen minute walk three days a week.
Walking is one of the best ways to increase our exercise and well-being. There are no gym fees to pay, we don’t need lots of expensive equipment or clothes. A comfortable pair of shoes and a warm coat are all that are required.
When you are walking, begin to walk mindfully. Take notice of what you see around you. Smile and say good morning or good afternoon to the other people you will see. If they don’t smile back that is their loss. Sometimes your smile can lift another person’s day.
One Sunday morning when I was walking my dog I spoke to an elderly gentleman on his way to collect his newspaper. ‘Good morning, what a lovely day,’ was all I said. ‘Thank you,’ he replied, ‘you are the first person who has spoken to me in days.’ We stopped for a chat about the weather and then each went our separate ways. Since that day I have made a point of saying good morning to people I see on my morning walk. I really don’t care if people think I am a bit crazy. One day I could be that elderly man who no one had spoken to in days.
So go for a walk, look at the flowers in front gardens, tubs and window boxes. Smile and say good morning even if people think you are a bit odd. You may never know the difference you can make to someone’s day.
I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including anxiety coping mechanisms, stress relief, weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online via Zoom. Please get in touch to find out more.
One step at a time
Did you manage dry January or was it more a dry couple of days in January? Did your New Year resolution to go to the gym at least three times a week last beyond the first week of the month? Perhaps there are still left over chocolates that sabotage your diet.
New Year resolutions are almost always doomed to fail. We start off with the best of intentions but the cold weather and the general gloom at the beginning of the year weaken the best resolve we have and then we give up.
When we give up we then berate ourselves. We tell ourselves we are hopeless and we have no willpower. This further saps our confidence in ourselves and we become less and less able to make the changes we want to make.
Why do we beat ourselves up? What is the point in making ourselves feel worse? If our friends came to us and told us that they were a failure because they ate a bar of chocolate or failed to go to the gym, we wouldn’t tell them how useless and hopeless they were. We would encourage them to try again. Tell them that they can lose weight, get fit or find a better job, whatever their resolution is.
Why don’t we try it that way and encourage ourselves? If we have over eaten or if we drank too much over the weekend why don’t we tell ourselves we can start again? After all, a year is just 52 weeks so we can pick ourselves up on the 1st February and start again.
One of the mistakes is trying to do too much. In January we write a shopping list. We will lose weight, get fit, find a new job etc. What if we picked one small thing like cutting out the chocolate biscuits with our morning coffee as our resolution for February, rather than cutting out everything nice in January? After three weeks we wouldn’t miss the biscuits at all and we have achieved our resolution and if we slipped up one day that doesn’t mean total failure it just means you failed on that day. In March we can go back to the gym perhaps just once a week to start with and when it becomes a habit we can add more visits.
If we treat the start of each month as a New Year when December comes around we can surprise ourselves with a whole new us. Remember that a journey of a thousand miles begins with one step: let February be the month you start a new resolution however small.
I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including anxiety coping mechanisms, stress relief, weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online via Zoom. Please get in touch to find out more.
Making Christmas Memories
Everyone is fearful of another lockdown at Christmas, another year in which we can’t see family and friends. There may be some empty seats at the dinner table this year and more than the usual number of toasts to absent friends.
It is more important than ever before that we take time to sit back and relax this year and to enjoy being reunited with our family. Many people spent last Christmas alone, only speaking to loved ones on the phone or via zoom.
In 2021 it is important that we don’t get overwhelmed by the desire to make a perfect Christmas. Christmas isn’t about the perfectly wrapped present or the beautiful table centre. Christmas is about making memories and having fun.
Whoever is doing the cooking you make sure they don’t miss out by being in the kitchen all morning. If the pigs in blankets are from the supermarket and not home-made does it really matter? (And if someone says these are the best you have ever made, smile and keep your secret).
If you are feeling overwhelmed don’t mutter to yourself in the kitchen, ask for help. Plan your day in advance thinking who will be present and allocate tasks like laying the table or peeling the potatoes. Don’t ask or wait for them to offer, explain what needs to be done. They might not realise you’re overwhelmed.
Christmas is for having fun not being a martyr. So what if the custard is lumpy – it can become part of Christmas folklore. The best Christmas memories are made up of conversations that go “remember the Christmas when…”.
If you need a break – five minutes alone away from the noise and the chatter -then take it even if it means locking yourself in the bathroom for a while.
Christmas is all about friends, family and the festivities, but self care is still important. This doesn’t have to mean another glass of sherry or too much wine, it can mean a much needed cup of tea and peace and quiet. If the weather permits, five minutes outside in the fresh air can restore tattered nerves.
We don’t have to try even harder to make up for last year. Enjoying this year is what is important.
Whatever your plans are for Christmas I hope this year they go ahead for all of us and that you have a Very Merry Christmas!
I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including anxiety coping mechanisms, stress relief, weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online via Zoom. Please get in touch to find out more.
Memories are made of…
It has been happening all through lockdown. We have been gripped with the decluttering bug. Friends and neighbours have been turning out lofts and watching videos on Youtube explaining how and why we need to declutter.
It is true we are all guilty of keeping odds and ends just in case they will be useful one day. Empty tins that get filled with buttons and screws that we collect and this last year has been a good time to throw stuff away and make space in our lives.
There is however another side to clutter. Recently I moved house. I like many have been shocked at the junk I have kept over the years and there have been many trips to the tip in the weeks before the move.
I have a large old cupboard that belonged to my grandmother and after much soul searching decided that yes I would take it with me and find space for it in the new house. I have been surprised it has fitted in well almost as if it belongs here and I am pleased that I decided it had to stay.
Last week my eldest granddaughter came over to help me empty boxes and we decided to put the stuff back in the centre part of the cupboard which has a glass door and is laughingly known as my cabinet of curiosities. The things in there range from buttons off a uniform, old coins, tiny elephants (given to my mother on her wedding day by her great aunt for good luck) and a whole multitude of other bits and pieces of no intrinsic value.
As we put them back I realised that each had a story to tell not just the tiny elephants and with my granddaughter we shared the stories about why these things had been kept. At the end of the afternoon my granddaughter said I want a cabinet of curiosities one day and I felt glad that I still had a home for grannies cupboard, and the clutter that is in it.
Another bundle of clutter that has joined me on my move as some of the cards and things that my children and now grandchildren made at school for special occasions. When my sister died a few years ago and sadly her only daughter had to clear her belongings she told me that it made her sad that her mother hadn’t kept a single card or picture from her days at school
Her mother had proudly displayed her graduation picture but she had found nothing even in the corner of a drawer that brought back memories of when she made that for her mother. My sister had moved around a great deal and I am sure it was just the necessities of moving that had caused her to be so ruthless. I know she loved her daughter and was proud of her. Sometimes we need to remember that what we call clutter can have memories attached.
Most families bring out a box of Christmas decorations that have been handed down over the years and share memories of when they were bought or made. A old neighbour of mine used to throw away her decorations every year and next year had a new theme on her christmas tree. My box of decorations goes back generations and every year like Grannie’s cupboard brings back memories even if some of them are now too tatty to come out of the box.
So if you are planning to declutter, remember that sometimes that tatty bit of junk may mean something to someone one day.
I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online via Zoom. Please get in touch to find out more.
Hypnobirthing: What it is and what are the benefits
Giving birth is one of the most beautiful events that we as humans get to experience. Yet even when we are aware of its magic, the idea of giving birth is often met with dread. Find out how hypnobirthing can help overcome this.
Having a baby is recognized as an excruciating, laborious task. Still, it is so obviously worth it that moms around the world are willing to put their minds and bodies through fits of intense pain and tension, and healthcare providers are there to quickly offer pain-relieving drugs.
But what if, during labour, your mind and body was so relaxed that you felt significantly less pain and tension? What if birth was something you looked forward to rather than feared? A more stress-free natural birth is entirely possible, and it begins with hypnotherapy.
What is Hypnobirthing?
Created by hypnotherapist and Harvard University Ford Foundation fellow Marie Mongan, hypnobirthing takes a more holistic approach to childbirth. Hypnobirthing, sometimes known as ‘birth hypnotherapy,’ is a form of self-hypnosis that keeps the mother calm, focused, relaxed, and positive while giving birth.
The result? Healthy women, in-touch with their hormones and breathing, experiencing a beautiful birth with reduced pain and tension. Celebrities such as Angelina Jolie, The Duchess of Cambridge, and Fearne Cotton have talked about the positive, euphoric, and entrancing experience of hypnobirthing. The Duchess of Cambridge proudly used hypnobirthing methods to prepare for Prince Louis’s birth, such as visualizing the birth that she wanted and practising her breathing.
Using deep breathing techniques, visualisation, positive affirmations, guidance from their partners, and comfortable labour measures, women can train their brains to go into a deep state of focus and relaxation.
Birth hypnotherapy gives you the tools to experience birthing in an atmosphere free of fear and tension that prevents the body’s muscles from functioning as nature intended. This state of relaxation and tranquillity will encourage endorphins, your body’s natural relaxant, to dismiss the stress hormones causing pain and constriction.
The Benefits
This natural controlled birth experience comes with a plethora of benefits, including (but not limited to) reduced pain, powerful stress-relieving techniques, feelings of empowerment and control, knowledge of your body and its natural processes, intense bonding with your partner and baby, and more.
Pain Reduction
One of the most incredible benefits of birth hypnotherapy is its ability to reduce pain during birth. According to Dr Dick-Read ‘the father of natural childbirth’, hypnotherapy helps women break out of the ‘fear-tension-pain syndrome’ that causes blood to flow away from the uterus and larger leg muscles, making labour more strenuous.
Hypnobirthing’s emphasis on hypnosis can bring a woman into a state of deep relaxation within the body, encouraging muscles to perform the way they’re meant to without limitations. Plus, hypnobirthing is a fantastic option for those women who want to have a natural birth without the use of pain medication.
The Power of the Breathing
Hypnobirthing focuses on breathing techniques that not only promote a calm and comfortable birth by triggering your parasympathetic nervous system, but these tools can also help those women who experience panic attacks and shortness of breath due to fear, nervousness, and labour pains. After birth, these techniques can stick with you to help deal with anxiety and stress and help towards a more healthy life.
Studies have shown that proper breathing, in through the nose and out through the mouth, is essential for supporting a healthy immune system, optimising the function of organs, and even aiding in digestion.
Presence in the Moment
Giving birth is a natural, magical, raw experience that can be fully understood and appreciated when the mind and body work in tandem. Women can feel empowered, knowledgeable, and prepared to give birth because they have the tools and knowledge to aid them, even when it gets tough.
Better Postpartum Experience
Women who have given birth using hypnotherapy have found the postpartum period much more manageable with reduced instances of post-natal depression, in part due to the positive decisions they made before and during delivery. Others have claimed that Hypno-birthed babies are calmer and easier going.
Hypnobirthing also strengthens the mother-baby bond as mother and child are freely immersed in natural, ecstatic birth hormones. In this state, you are free to use your own natural birthing abilities while feeling controlled, delighted, and profoundly relaxed.
Even after you give birth, you will be able to use the skills and relaxation techniques you’ve learned through hypnobirthing to find ease and serenity during times of stress and trouble.
Where to Start
For those interested in learning the art of using your own natural birthing abilities to feel calm, relaxed and enjoy the birthing experience, please contact me to arrange a free consultation to see if hypnobirthing is right for you.
As an experienced practitioner who has studied advanced hypnotherapy, psychotherapy, and Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) techniques, I can walk you through the Hypnobirthing childbirth method. My approach to the hypnobirthing method teaches you to be in control as you call upon your body’s own natural responses. You will learn to lessen or even eliminate any pain, discomfort, or need for medication.
Even if you regularly meditate or use hypnosis, it is highly recommended that you see a Hypnobirthing specialist and take classes through them. You will gain so much more and become more prepared to give birth by listening to and following an expert’s extensive knowledge and methods.
Get in touch today to find out more.
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