During this strange time when we have all been shocked and saddened by the death of Queen Elizabeth II.  Many people have spoken of their surprise at the sense of loss that they themselves have felt.

The death of the Queen has caused many people to revisit their own personal losses of parents, grandparents, family members and close friends.  When we suffer a bereavement the grief grows less over time.  It doesn’t completely heal but a scab forms and we lose the immediate sense of loss.

When there is a national bereavement such as we are now experiencing that scab is lifted and we find that underneath there is still a sore place.  Memories return of those times of personal loss and we realise once again we will never speak with our loved ones or hear their voice.  

As we get older there are more losses in our lives and more scabs that are lifted.  It is no surprise then that many people feel a sense of grief that leaves them with a desire to show that grief.  Whether we leave flowers at the palace or sign a book of remembrance we are also acknowledging our own losses.

In today’s fast paced world often we have little time to grieve.  When we lose an elderly parent there is often a sense that they had a good long life so there is little need to grieve their passing.  What we feel is the loss of all those memories of the times we had together and however old they are we still  feel a sense of shock at their passing.

If you have lost a loved one perhaps you could buy a bunch of their favourite flowers, not to put in a cold churchyard but to put in your home and remember them. It’s less the things we do that we regret, it’s the things we don’t do.  If our elderly relatives are still around, perhaps we can spare five minute for a cup of tea or a brief telephone call, even if their response is not always as gracious as we’d like.  

As we look at the faces of the Queen’s family coming to terms with the loss of their mother, spare a moment to remember all those we have also lost.

I have worked as a hypnotherapist in Leatherhead and London and I also teach hypnotherapy and train new hypnotherapists. I offer a full range of services including coping mechanisms for grief, stress relief, anxiety, weight loss, stop smoking and treatment for phobias online via Zoom. Please get in touch to find out more.